Tales from a gate [Friday, 2016-01-08]

This is the tale of a gate, OpalGate to be precise, or at least that’s how it’s been dubbed by triggered purplehairs.

Time has passed, enough to not jeopardize the operation I set up at least, things have been said about the incident, and how I handled things, or how they’ve been handled by the purplehairs, and my intent is to tell the hilarious tale of it all from my perspective.

It was a sunny summer day and I just got back from my volunteering, I get at my laptop, C-a 2 to the mutt screen window, I and let POP3 do its thing.

As the flow of emails comes through I notice I really smell like dog, I ignore the smell and start tabbing through the unread emails and C-r the ones I don’t care about but are nonetheless there because I’m too lazy to unwatch the repos.

One catches my eye, [opal] Transpho..., I don’t read any further because there’s no need to, I already know the content of the issue and the nature of the OP. Who is always, no matter what, a faggot.

I open up the link to the issue on my browser and start reading. As I read a huge smile slowly creeps on my face and I think “it finally happened, they hit one of my projects, now I can send a statement”.

I don’t read what Elia said on Twitter because I don’t care, all I care about is having some fun and testing out my theory that an SJW shitstorm can be abused to increase the popularity of a project positively.

First I needed the spark to light the fire, so I just say what I wished the owners and authors of the many projects hit by purplehairs I always read about on /g/ would say: “if you could do anything worthwhile, you would, now contribute or GTFO”.

Since I also needed a calm and logical baseline to defend my barricade I write up another reply elaborating my position and explaining why the request to remove Elia was absurd in the most rational and cool-headed way possible.

The fundamental advantage I had in this situation was simple: Adam is the good, Elia is the bad, and I am the ugly.

Keep in mind all thorough the issue I wasn’t in contact with either Elia or Adam, but I knew how they’d act: Elia wouldn’t risk making his situation worse by getting involved in the issue, and Adam would be too busy to notice the shitstorm I was creating in time to stop it, and would then come and “fix” it.

Back in the issue some cuck replies and my sides leave orbit, someone who never contributed, and probably didn’t even know about the project before the purplehair signal was lit, chimes in to say he won’t contribute to any projects Elia maintains, like it would be a loss.

Then some comments from the purplehairs and cucks, some comments against them, and suddenly man the harpoons! Apparently it’s off-limits to use an open source or free software project someone you don’t like is involved in, we ain’t getting paid to work on it, boycotting doesn’t work when there’s no loss of profit.

Typical tactic “I won’t use it!”, “I won’t contribute!”, “I won’t X”, wake up, it’s open source or free software, we aren’t getting anything out of users and we aren’t getting anything out of contributors who won’t bring any good, unless you think you can live off exposure.

I get that most of them are huge attention whores who feed off exposure, which makes it even funnier since all their worth comes from giving it, they can’t even fathom their attention to be worthless.

The bigger part of the SJW mob arrives, shit flinging ensues, logical fallacies left and right, lots of laughing at all the purplehairs and cucks being unable to see past their overlord agenda and thinking they’re on reddit and sending comments with just @T :+1:.

Suddenly pedophiles are brought into the picture, THINK OF THE CHILDREN! WON’T SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?

Having stated earlier in the issue that everyone was welcome, of course, I say even pedophiles would be welcome, everyone is if their contributions are worthwhile, why wouldn’t they.

Then finally one of the cucks mentions Hitler, I start laughing heartily and by the rules of the Internet declare my victory in the argument, but of course it wasn’t over.

Some retard tries to argue on Twitter and gets BTFO with the power of a thousand white suns.

In the meantime an issue about including a Code of Conduct in Opal gets opened, I’m not entirely against it, as long as it doesn’t ban freedom of speech in any way.

With this action, some have said I yielded to the purplehairs, but I actually didn’t, that’s the fun of it. The Code of Conduct included in Opal does exactly nothing. Nothing changed within the project. Nothing changed within the group of contributors. All it did was make sure the purplehairs and cucks wouldn’t have any bullets against Opal.

Then 4chan caught the smell of it, and the shit flinging increased dramatically, kind of hindering my stand, you fucking faggots; next time something like this happens and you have one of your own on the defending side, don’t start shitposting like you always do, just stay out of it and let them handle it.

No matter, in the end they lost in the most hilarious way, they made Opal more popular, making it known to people who didn’t even know it existed, and disabled themselves by getting a gimped Code of Conduct included and making the only person who agreed with them, Adam Beynon, leave the project.

PS: This must be one of my crowning achievements.